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[.inside myself I'm breaking]
Inside myself Iím breaking
donít know the reason why
canít see things in black and white
in a grey world I lay.
Iím falling down
canít see the ground.
Black oceanís deep
call me ďblack sheepĒ.
Nobody there to hold me
Iím falling down Ė straight into darkness
you canít hear me screaming your name
you canít even dry the tears Iím crying
youíre not able to catch me on my journey
Ė on my journey into the great nowhere
The unbelievable huge nothing
inside myself the rule of the emptiness
inside myself Ė a white and blank room
Canít you hear me screaming?
Canít you hear me falling on the ground?
Canít you see Ė Iím bleeding!
Sometimes it goes up and sometimes down.
I hope you see
That Iím still breathing.
Allthough you wonít react.
I hope itís real
That thereís this feeling
Inside you Ė anywhere.
There are so many words
I want to tell you
To show Ė there is a ME!
There are so many things
Want to hear their truth
Understand Ė me and you.
I want to walk to you
I want to talk to you
I want to smile again.
I was not afraid
I wonít be afraid
But maybe Ė I am.
Youíve never seen the blue sky
Youíve never heard the birds sing
Youíve never noticed the wolves cry
Out for the moon.
Maybe youíve never seen the bright side
Of the life that youíre living now.
But maybe you see that Iím right
With the words I sing...
I know Iím not a poet, I know I am not great,
But thereís something that I know deep inside of myself.
Everybody has the right to laugh and see the brighter side.
Everybody is allowed to scream out loud,
The feelings and the joy.
And I know that everybody who is a great person
Will live a great life. Anytime-
And I know you have the right to laugh and see the brighter side.
You are allowed to scream out loud,
Your feelings and the joy.
I know that youíre a really great person
And youíll live a great life. Anytime-
I know Iím not a poet, I know Iím not that great,
But this is something that I know...deep inside of myself...
if you don't see the lovely moon
and you're waiting for the shooting stars
to reach you
wait 'til the bad day ends
and the all refreshing night begins^^
Maybe you donít know the feeling
Of not beeing accepted...
But a part of myself isnít...
Because a really important friendship of mine
isnít accepted by all people Ė
and that hurts.
Iím okay if not everybody likes me
I wouldnít cry if just a few people do so...
But there are other friendships which are crying because of this one...
And there is a feeling inside myself that the other one of this critizised friendship
is thinking like the others Ė
because he doesnít want to make them cry...
But donít you see? Ė Iím crying...
Just because I was too afraid
One girl almost cried...
I didnít want to maker her cry.
I didnít want to hurt her Ė but I did Ė
like always Ė and I hate myself for that.
Always, I hurt people who I like...
words can hurt more than action...
But Iím not that actove person...
only my mouth spits the action...
and it spits the tears on their cheeks and in their eyes.
Thereís a voice inside my head commanding:
Just close your mouth, little girl Ė
And everybodyís happy.
Donít say anything Ė
Itís the best you can do.
Just gulp and smile...just forget everything I wanted to say.
Just keep silend...just smile...
[...tO bE continueD...]